TravisBedard.com

Actor, Puppeteer, and Teaching Artist

What is Making me Happy This Week: A Cop Out

It’s been a long year, a long month and a long week.Bilbo would have said I was too little butter scraped over too much bread. He’d be right.

The Head closed and struck this weekend and was a hugely positive experience, but it’s over.
And post show is postshow.

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My next show, Nursery Crimes, gallops apace… but I am having trouble attacking it.
Our new kitty Ygritte isn’t having trouble attacking anything.
One of my bosses at day-work herniated a disc and after a week of pain he had it surgerized.
I miss my wife.
I miss family.
I need a break.

But here’s the thing. For most of my life I’d have been fetal on the couch moaning about the pity that is my (unfairly successful) life. I’d be self-sabotaging left and right so as to free up the next six months.

So I think what’s making me happy this week is… that I’m happy at all. 

That the tired and the grind isn’t wearing me down in this period of my life the way it has in times past, making progress impossible. Rather than this tired being a depression trigger it’s the mood equivalent of a cough or a slight fever. I can’t say up as late as I can when I don’t have the metaphysical sniffles, but neither am I down for the count.

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One thought on “What is Making me Happy This Week: A Cop Out

  1. “The mood equivalent of a cough or a slight fever.” YES! It’s been a while since I’ve had a full-blown-nightmare-depression-episode (knock on wood and be thankful for antidepressants) but I have had days and weeks of this “metaphysical sniffles”.

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